legba lodge: 7/1/26

"The transubstantiation of feeling .. that's what we're doing here"

- from Mother Mary

.. thus is it with the purported master;

they either justify, or fail to justify, themselves ..

.. they might be popular .. but we're precision ..

.. wouldn't it be interesting if that's where we encountered them ..?

.. the aliens ..

.. which is to say, maybe we already have ..

.. & what are microbes, viruses, fungi & even microfauna if not alien categories;

literally xenomorphic dimensions of intelligence ..

survival of the $hitte$t ..?

.. the problem with being a reasonable person is you'll encounter a lot of unreasonable people .. think about it; just statistically, it's an inevitability ..

.. the question, tho, is where is the line between sheer probabilities & evidence of the impending collapse of society, exactly; what would the latter look like "on the ground", as it were ..?

.. a topic well worth reflecting on & mulling over from multiple angles is that of those models that foresee a wide-ranging & far-reaching societal collapse in our very lifetimes ..

.. & as the warmer weather seems to get into people's heads & somehow shortens their fuses, the subject seemingly resonates & reverberates & echoes again ..

.. but then the question is, do we trust suggestions from the depths when mercury is in rx ..? .. put another way, is this a real con cern that's worth reflecting on & worrying about, or just another distraction ..?

.. rest assured that the oligarchs are not taking chances; the billionaires are building bunkers .. & we definitely shouldn't leave the future of humanity to them, for hopefully obvious reasons ..

.. in any case, one could just as well ask if humanity as such wouldn't be better off in the wake of a widespread & global societal collapse .. for, surely, one could argue that civilization itself has been a history of decline ever since the bronze age .. till then, we'd just been wanderers, wondering ..

.. & the magician, having put in the Work, has finagled the truth of this world .. naturally, this would significantly boost their chances of surviving basically the end of the world as they'd hitherto known it, at the least; at best, it could even guarantee said survival ..

.. you have to move with the rhythm of the world,

but not necessarily to it ..

.. to remain pertinent ..

I find I keep talking to myself.
No matter how hard I try, then, BAM -
What happened? I can't remember anything...
Where am I?

Sound familiar? Yeah, might just do that.
Origin stories.

The past is co-present in the now as a surface is on the deep.

The now is not easily decomposed into its forward and retrograde fluxes -
in the experiential realm.

The body remains behind and the personality dissolves, there is no more.(: "ME"), all that's remotely connected to me, gone - but I keep coming back.

A tube of light, at the end: ME (and the world) - all around this orb, darkness, with this thing of "ME" in the center.

I think I like me, so I didn't continue on into the darkness, searching for any other light.

All of "people" was within the orb that was "ME", it was the bundle of all my experience of what people are and do, have been and will be. All the baggage of personality and habit and attitude.

The "ME"-ness seemed to be the only viewpoint available... but, I didn't continue... falling? away through the darkness.

Would I have been pulled back? I think so. Sometimes it's seemed to me there's a great terror that I might fall out of the web of existence - give up having ever been human. Is the terror only mine?

I was lying down, feet to approximate north(east)ish, looking up at a ceiling.

Had my visual field had been in a different sort of alignment with Earthly gravity, what would have happened? Would this seeming death experience have occurred, or something else entirely? The self, myself at least, seems to have a focus in the visual field - I find "ME", myself, mostly somewhere more-or-less in my head.

When we die, if we're lucky, we're lying down asleep in bed.

This "ME" was "THE" reality that contained the world as known to "ME". It WILL fall away one day, in this experience of bodily and personality death and then maybe we have no choice but to wander for another light, an open space.

Is this dark telescopic tube with a seeming orb the same as some see near death? Don't go into the light at the end of the tunnel and all that - where else would I go, but into "ME"?

Unlike usual, the optic field seemed to be transforming like a cone closing down into a line, where the world as visual (primarily, but of all sense) was the disk at the end of that truncated cone and "I" was at its apex.

Smoother, but a bit like the old televisions when the electron beam in the cathode ray tube displays was dying down and losing energy with the back reactive flash of a beam of light collapsing to center. Maybe that's what I missed?: the back reactive flash that would occur had I fully withdrawn from "ME" and all that entails.

Then again, it seems I'm not ready to leave this thing called [INSERT NAME] - I have attachments, and one day, when the world is ready for me to be gone, maybe I'll find some other light or all the energy of the world that was "ME" somehow returns through that apex into another life that could perhaps be conscious through transition, but the nature of the being seems to be that we do not want to remember.